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Tom Foster spends most of his time talking with managers and business owners. The conversations are about business lives and personal lives, goals, objectives and measuring performance. Read More...
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Fri, June 19th, 2009 by Tom Foster
"Do you bring value in this manager-team member relationship by issuing directives and orders, calling meetings (that she doesn't show up to), getting angry when she doesn't do what you tell her to do?" I challenged.
"I would think that she would have some respect," Joan finally fought back.
I shook my head and stared. "As a manager, you will never get respect, you can only earn respect. And you can only earn respect by bringing value to her problem solving and decision making. Can you bring value by issuing directives and orders?"
"Based on the response I am getting from her, obviously not," Joan replied.
"Can you bring value to the relationship, value to her problem solving and decision making by asking questions?"
Joan tilted her head back. The tension in her face turned calm. "I can ask questions," she repeated.
"Can you push her thinking by asking questions? Can you broaden the scope of her solutions? Can you bring in other perspectives by asking questions? Can you challenge her assumptions, bring in alternatives, anticipate contingencies, bottlenecks, all by asking questions?"
Joan smiled, and nodded. "I think I know what to do."
Hi Tom,
That's the key right there. This has been a great little series/story.
When I think back about all of the managers I've had over the years, definitely the most effective were those who discussed things and asked questions to help me broaden my perspective and/or challenge my assumptions.
Kevin Black
Getting knocked up might be the push I needed to stop being lazy and pursue a real career